Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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