I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
