Im at strip club and am horny
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
