Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
