See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
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