Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
