You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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