I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
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you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
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Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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