her vagine was all disorganized.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
