he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize