if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize