She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
