so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
