The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Randomize
