so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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