JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
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Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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