ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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