I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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