I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
