My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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