why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize
