Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize