Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
