Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
