so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
