you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize