well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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