after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize