My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Randomize
