are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
