Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
