just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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