I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize