Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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