TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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