how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Randomize