I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
