O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
