Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
