He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
