A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I don't deserve a penis
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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