Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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