You can't motorboat a personality
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
