you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
