these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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