Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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