3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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