JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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