my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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