If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Randomize